The Medicine Wombyn in my family have taught me at a young age to always have respect for Plant Spirits, which is why I have always been very careful with regards to participating in Ayahuasca ceremonies.
Although my family members are Herbalists (General medicine, Ayahuascer@s, Kambo-er@s, etc) deep within the mountains of Mexico, I never really took interest in really exploring their medicine, when I was younger. My family would introduce me to plant medicine concoctions; however, most of it didn't taste good to me, and as a child-- taste was very important with regards to my decision in ingesting. Yes, I would listen to them teach me things, and I would have small tiny samples of concoctions (Pulque being the worst); however, I refused to participate in any manner that went beyond the verbal lessons. Although I regret not exploring that further with my family when I was a child, I am very thankful that the opportunity to learn these traditions have arisen during a later moment in my life. I am thankful to have received and continue to receive these Ancestral teachings from my family. I have even discussed my desire to write a book that documents these herbal remedies, with my father and aunt-- two important herbalists in my family. I am so happy that both have agreed to contribute to this process. My intent is to preserve these teachings from the elders, and pass them down to the younger generations. I cannot wait to begin this process <3
One of the most important teachings I have received from numerous Elders in my family is to always respect the Spirit of the Plant, and its teachings/medicine. I was taught at a very young age to always connect with the plant, show respect and appreciation, gratitude for all of its medicine. I was taught that in order to really work with a plant, it is best recommended to grow the plant from inception to ingestion-- to support it with love so that it will also support you with the same respect and love.
My very first paper in college was on Ayahuasca. I was 19 years old. I was assigned to research the Shibipo Nation for the entire semester of Cultural Anthropology. I really didn't know what topic to focus on with regards to the assignment: language, practice, societal seclusion/preservation, geography, food, art, etc. During my exploration, I saw that most of the knowledge that was being presented to me consisted of Grandmother Ayahuasca. The Universe threw ideas and lessons about Grandmother from left to right-- to the point that I felt I had no other choice, and made the decision to give in, and study her.
Upon finishing my study with Grandmother, I made the decision to NEVER EVER participate in an Ayahuasca ceremony. I reflected on the lessons my family have taught me, with regards to plant spirits, and the process of connecting from inception. I said to myself: "There is no way that I will ever connect with Ayahuasca-- EVER. The only way I will connect with her is if she calls me; if she doesn't call me-- I am good. I shall leave the plant alone."
Since that time, I have been presented with numerous opportunities to explore Grandmother, but I always found myself going back to the decision that I made when I was 19 years old-- the decision of not exploring her unless given consent by her Spirit. I understood that Grandmother is a force that you do not want to mess with. Grandmother is not here to entertain-- she is here to heal. Reflecting on this experience now, is allowing me to see that her medicine had connected with me during the course of writing my paper. It was HER energy that created this boundary-- this teaching of respect. I am very thankful for that lesson, especially now that I understand Her, and the medicine she brings. I cannot imagine someone connecting with Grandmother out of "curiosity," nor without proper preparation. *sigh* I find it very disrespectful when I hear of individuals utilizing her sacred body without honoring her in ceremony-- this is absolutely unacceptable. We must always honor her Spirit and our LOVE by engaging in ceremony-- with Icaros and under the supervision of a Curander@ who has extensively studied energetic forces with regards to the human body-- from the physical to the intrasychic to the multidimensional aspect of existence.
My decision to connect with Grandmother was made after she called me-- she literally called me on the phone, through my Mentor, who I had just recently met at the time, and had no idea as to what was going on in my life. I was going through some very heavy purging with regards to the exposure of severe violence within the community I served for almost 10 years. My role at the time was to be a Super Hue-Man-- destroying chaos and violence present in society-- from murders to suicides to sexual assault to you name it. The constant exposure created a form of vicarious trauma within my psyche that affected me tremendously. Grandmother somehow found herself through the madness and into my life to heal me. My relationship with her, since then, has been beyond ---- I have no words.
I hold the deepest love, respect and gratitude for her--- with every ounce of my being, as she has assisted me tremendously during those heavy moments of healing. I can say with great respect that she is the greatest Curandera, and I am so blessed to have formed this divine relationship with her.
I have learned that with her-- there is no space for a hyperactive Ego.
This is why, during ceremony, I am extremely careful in taking more than one cup.
It is important to note the difference between Grandmother asking you to have another cup, or your EGO telling you to have another cup "because you don't feel it," or whatever other popular reason people have.
This journey is not about ego dictations.
The journey is not about "getting high."
This journey is not about how "strong" the medicine is.
This journey is about healing!!!
Grandmother will come to you as a lighted path.
She will come to you AS NEEDED.
A friendly reminder: THIS IS MEDICINE.
If you are looking for a drug, something to fulfill a thrill--
I do recommend that you smoke some DMT and keep it moving.
When it comes to Grandmother:
Be conscious and be respectful.
Listen to the plant doctors-- they know best.
Grandmother has tested me with this numerous times.
During my ceremony last month, I was in PURE love bliss. There was a point where I began to feel as if the medicine was diminishing. When the time came to get a second cup, I asked Grandmother if I should partake in another round, and she said: "No." I questioned her why I could not have another cup. She explained to me that it is the ego that is requesting the cup-- and if I follow the ego when it is unnecessary to do so, against her directives-- there will be an lesson to learn for the Ego. Hardcore lessons from Grandmother within the other dimension is not something I want to experiment with when it is unnecessary.
I have a choice.
I have the choice.
I can learn how to control the beast (Ego's untamed desires) by processing it on my own-- or I can enter the portal a bit further for some more and rock and roll with the lessons Grandmother will provide.
Hmmm... which one do I want?
I mean, either way I am learning from her because she is telling me what to do-- but what reality is it that I want to create for myself so that I can understand?
She also told me that the medicine I had in my body and my experience was perfect as it was, and to just trust it..... to trust her. I am so thankful that I did not take the other cup because she was correct-- every single part of that ceremony was PERFECT-- so perfect that it is my most favorite journey that I have EVER shared with her-- out of ALL the many journey's I have taken. I am so happy that I did not listen to the ego or else I would not have had an opportunity to experience that. I mean, don't get me wrong, all ceremonies are beautiful and I am so thankful for them all; however, this one specific ceremony really really touched my heart in a specific special way.
During this last ceremony, I tuned in, with regards to having a second cup. Grandmother had already told me earlier, prior to ceremony, that I would have another cup. Although Grandmother mentioned earlier, prior to ceremony that I should have another cup, I decided to put that information aside, and explore further the option, once I was in the other dimension.
I consulted with Grandmother when the table was open for a second round. Again-- Grandmother said: "Go. Do it. Get another cup" ... and so it is! .... and once again, it was the PERFECT decision. Yes, that round was very, very heavy; however, it was exactly what I needed. I remember, I asked Grandmother: "Why is it that the medicine feels so heavy right now?" Grandmother responded: "...because it takes heavy medicine to address and heal the heavy energies you posses. Frequencies have to match or be of greater intensity." I love how she explained the entire process to me. This brought a sense of comfort during the energy crisis I was experiencing.
Anyhow, I just wanted to share a little bit more on Grandmother, and the atmosphere she has created within my holographic space. There's so much more; however, I am going to leave it at that for now because I don't want to write a book right now... I mean I do, but I don't, as sleep awaits
I love Grandmother
and she loves me
May you have a beautiful blessed day!